The Best Bible Verses to Use During Discipline
Proverbs tells us, “Even a child is known by his doings…” (Prov 20:11). I don’t know about you, but I want my child’s “doings” to be good and honorable. Unfortunately, as a pastor once said, “children are born filthy sinners.” To put it another way, “foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child” (Prov. 22:15). Using Bible verses during discipline gives parents the perfect words to be the voice in their heads.
It’s time to throw out the phrase “because I said so,” and fill our parenting arsenal with Bible verses that speak directly to the problems.
The Bible is chock-full of helpful verses to use for teaching and correcting. It even says, “ All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness…” (2 Timothy 3: 16). It’s time to throw out the phrase “because I said so,” and fill our parenting arsenal with Bible verses that speak directly to the problems.
One way we learn these verses (and others) is through songs. My favorite scripture songs come from Seeds family worship, the old Psalty the Songbook songs-bonus if you can get your hands on the CD’s, and Hide ’em in your heart.
Here are some of the BEST verses to teach children and then use during discipline as a reminder:
1. "Do everything without complaining or arguing so that you may be blameless and pure children of God"
Philippians 4: 14-15
Complaining and Arguing. Simple. Don’t complain. Don’t argue. The Bible says.
2. "And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men "
Colossians 3:23
Sloppy, Unfinished Chores or Schoolwork. If you read the verse before and after this one, it talks about having a sincerity of heart and fear of the Lord as a motivator and gaining rewards in heaven for the work that we do. The work we do, no matter how mundane, is in service to the Lord. I often use an example of a person working for an angry, unkind boss. It might be difficult to work when someone is mean or harsh or it is something we don’t really want to do. So, we need to remind ourselves whom we are working for!
3. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres
Corinthians 15:4-8
Rude, Selfish Behavior When children fight and argue with parents or siblings, the root is generally selfishness (the opposite of love). I start by going through each word and I have had my children make a list. We talk about each one and give examples of a “unloving” behavior. When bad behavior sets in, I will ask the bickering children, “who is going to choose love and kindness right now?”
Some ways I have used this:
– When I see a child bring up past indiscretions of their sibling, I remind them… “love keeps no records of wrongs” and tell them to forgive and move on. We are supposed to love each other. If we do, we would be patient with them, kind to them…
-When one of my kids blows up at another one for taking her toy… “love is not easily angered”
-When someone yells, “it’s mine!!!!!” I use “love is not self-seeking”
-When one of my children comes to me to tattle on another, I can say, “love does not dishonor others”
-When a child seems excited over another getting in trouble, try, “love does not delight in evil”
4. So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you
Matthew 7:12
Unkindness It’s hard to argue with the golden rule. Sometimes when you turn the situation around metaphorically, the child can better understand why something is wrong.
5. But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ For whatever is more than these is from the evil one
Matthew 5:37
Breaking Promises. If we commit to something, we need to follow through. If we agree to do something, we should do it. This shows our character, we are people of our word.
6. My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry
James 1:19
Yelling, Quick-Tempered, Angry, Hitting Others. Have you ever met a child that didn’t get angry and start yelling at someone? I haven’t. Learning to control your temper is a skill. We have to teach children that people are going to make us angry, and how we respond to it the real test.
7. Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things
Philippians 4:8
Watching/reading/thinking about inappropriate things. This one is great for instructing children in choosing books or shows that are pure and good. It’s great for reiterating that we are in charge of what we put in our minds. I also use this when children have bad dreams or think scary thoughts at night. The Bible tells us to “take captive our thoughts”, like a prisoner. If they are allowing their thoughts to turn to scary, bad things, they can take those thoughts prisoner and choose noble, lovely, pure things to think about.
8. Fools vent their anger, but the wise quietly hold it back.
Proverbs 29:11
Loss of Self-Control When Angry. Just like the verse in #6, this proves that you can end up looking like a fool if you completely lose it when you are angry. Children to learn to step away from a situation and process their feelings so that the response turns out calm and logical and not feelings-driven.
9. The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.
Proverbs 18:21
Making Fun of Others. No one wants their child to turn out like the bratty kid in teen movies. The things we say to each other matter so much. We can build and encourage or hurt and tear down.
10. When I am afraid, I put my trust in you
Psalm 56:3
Fear when alone or at bedtime. Kids have so many fears. Some seem almost ridiculous at times, but they need to be addressed. We can teach them to trust in the Lord in the midst of fears.
I hope these verses help your family as much as they have helped mine. You may not see instant results, but using the Bible to correct a child causes them to think and hopefully redirects the behavior the next time.
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♥ Melanie
